Palin Blasts Wordle for Using Such Long Words

ANCHORAGE (The Borowitz Report)—Kicking off her marketing campaign for the United States Congress, Sarah Palin lashed out on the phrase sport Wordle for “using such long words.”

“Wordle uses words that are way too long for everyday Americans like me to guess,” she instructed her viewers at a marketing campaign cease in Anchorage. “When I tried to play Wordle, I did the same thing I did as governor—I quit halfway through.”

Palin additionally blasted the writer of Wordle, her longtime nemesis the New York Times. “Once again, the New York Times is using long words to make me feel bad about myself,” she mentioned.

The former governor mentioned that she is unconcerned that fifty different candidates are operating for Alaska’s open congressional seat. “Honestly, I can’t count that high,” she mentioned.

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