A mum has asked if she’s in the wrong from banning her mother-in-law from looking after her baby unsupervised after she overheard the older woman’s words to the child
Image: Getty Images/iStockphoto)
As a parent, it can be frustrating when your friends and family don’t respect the decisions you make for your own children.
Perhaps you want your little ones to eat more vegetarian or vegan food and their relatives keep serving up plates of meat.
Or you don’t want to get your child’s ears pierced, but your partner’s family keeps hinting about it.
The latter is the situation one mum claims to have found herself in after her mother-in-law continuously asked her when she was going to get her 10-month-old daughter’s ears pierced.
In a post on Reddit, the unnamed woman explained that she wanted to wait until her daughter asked to get her ears done, but that didn’t seem to sit well with her husband’s mum.
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Writing on the Am I The A**hole forum, the mum said: ” Since she was born my MIL has been on at me asking me when I’m going to have her ears pierced.
“She will not be having her ears pierced until she asks for it (so definitely not yet when she can’t even speak). She says it’s hypocritical of me considering all the piercings I have, but my own mother wouldn’t let me even get my earlobes pierced until I was 10.
“MIL had both SILs pierced when they were tiny, and she keeps going on about how ‘it’s better because they won’t remember it’.”
She goes on to say that her husband supports whatever decision she makes on the ear piercings.
“A few weeks ago, MIL was looking after the baby for us because I was going with husband to his uncle’s funeral. As I was coming down the stairs I hear MIL talking to the baby about how ‘they’re going to go out shopping and get her some pretty earrings’.
“I went into the room and told her in no uncertain terms that that would not be happening and if I can’t trust her to respect my decisions about my own daughter I would find someone else to look after her (I managed to get my sister to watch her).
“MIL keeps trying to arrange to have her for a few hours, she even tried to offer to have her overnight so we can go out. I refused, I told MIL she could come and visit her, but I no longer trusted her not to get her ears pierced behind my back, so she wouldn’t be seeing her unsupervised.”
The mum added that her husband and his sisters think she is overreacting, but she isn’t sure.
Her post quickly went viral, with more than 1,000 people responding to share their thoughts.
Many agreed she wasn’t in the wrong, with one person saying: “As a parent who actually had this happen, NTA. And BTW, I pressed assault charges and sued the company who did it without my consent.”
Another replied: “As a daughter who had this happen, it was traumatic and was months and months of pain and (ick) scabbing and so much pressure and blame for not taking care of them. Turns out I was allergic. My mom would take them out, my gran would force them back in. It was a nightmare.
“OP needs to die on that hill. Because if it isn’t piercing, it will be a haircut, first Santa pictures, painting nails… who knows? Boundary stompers gonna stomp. Best to remove that option altogether.”
Someone else added: “I always think it’s a red flag when someone pushes for unsupervised contact with a baby that isn’t theirs. There’s objectively no good reason for it, and the fact that they are even asking is a strong argument for them not getting it.”
What do you think? Let us know in the comments below.